Total Isms in the database:
1958
1958
Housisms for episode Ugly:
A film crew and the candidates are following around House distracting him while he is trying to diagnose a teenager who suffers from a heart attack prior to a serious plastic surgery.
House: What am I gonna do?
Dr. Wilson: Just enjoy.
House: I'm gonna keep her around because she makes me an idiot?
Dr. Wilson: Well you're protected. Foreman seems immune.
House: You think he's gay?
Dr. Wilson: Did he become an idiot around Chase?
Amber: Why did you bring her in so late? It's not fair, the rest of us...
House: Hey hey hey, you wanted fair you picked the wrong job, the wrong profession... the wrong species.
House: Just watch twenty minutes of this stuff. Tell me if I'm out of my mind.
Dr. Wilson: Finally, we have video evidence.
Amber: Why did you hire her?
House: Not in front of the company.
Kutner: Ah... Are we gonna be on TV?
House: I'm making a music video. Come on, little faster, more energy.
Taub: Why are you glad Foreman is not here?
House: Because he would object on what I'm about to do.
Dr. Cuddy: (House and Dr. Taub come to see Dr. Cuddy in the clinic) What are you two doing here?
House: Skipping three scenes. CT's back. He's gonna say that there's evidence of anomaly, I'm gonna say he's wrong, he's gonna go back to the father and we're all end up here.
Amber: Nasal Papilloma hemorrhage could overwhelm the heart.
House: Nice lipstick.
Amber: Thank you.
House: Bad idea. Hemorrhage came after the block. (tries to block the camera)
Dr. Foreman: House, let them do their job.
House: Is anybody here more interested in the medicine, little less interested in paparazzi?
House: Our patient has...
Amber: Why did you hire her?
House: Because she has way more diagnostic experience than the other swimsuit models I was considering.
House: On the other hand, cameras make people act. Sometimes like human beings, sometimes just weird. Sometimes, they wear open-tip bras.
Dr. Cuddy: (defensively) It's cold in here.
House: She said something idiotic again, and I didn't even notice it. Foreman had to point out it was idiotic. She's making me an idiot.
Dr. Wilson: It's cute, you have a crush.
House: No, I think it's something systemic.
Dr. Wilson: Thirteen's pretty. You're obviously okay with her.
House: She killed a patient.
Dr. Wilson: The bitch is pretty.
House: The bitch is a bitch.
Dr. Wilson: Ask her out.
House: The bitch? She's a bitch.
Dr. Wilson: No, the one who's making you an idiot. It's the story of life; boy meets girl. Boy gets stupid. Boy and girl live stupidly ever after.
Dr. Cuddy: You think I like the cameras? You think I want the whole world watching you checking out my ass and question my wardrobe?
House: Would it be better if I checked out your wardrobe and questioned your ass?
Dr. Cuddy: A little part of me…
House: There is no little part of you.
House: Let's go for a walk. Walks give the illusion of the story moving forward.
House: I think she might be an idiot.
Dr. Wilson: Who?
House: But she can't be an idiot. She was in the CIA for God's sake.
Dr. Wilson: The Bay of Pigs was a daring triumph.
House: She had good ideas in Langley.
Dr. Wilson: All your ideas.
House: She was able to identify that they were good ideas.
Dr. Wilson: Stab in the dark here. Is she pretty?
House: She's new. She's nervous.
Dr. Wilson: She's a C-Cup?
House: She said one dumb thing in a differential. They all say dumb things in differentials.
Dr. Wilson: A D-Cup? If she's no good just fire her.
House: I can't! I just hired her. She left a career.
Dr. Wilson: Wow. Either that's actual guilt or I've got to see this woman.
House: I think I’m going blind.
Dr. Wilson: Hairy palms too?
House: Just a warning. We have to start getting consent every time we do a procedure, pretty soon they’ll want informed consent.
House: Wow, you are ugly.
Kenny: Wow, you’re an ass.
Dr. Wilson: Where'd you get those keys?
House: Blue the janitor.
Dr. Wilson: What?
House: That's his name.
Dr. Wilson: His name is Lou.
House: I owe him an apology.
Taub: There’s a mass lesion in the left anterior temporal lobe surrounded by edema.
House: Did you just insult me in Pig Latin?
Dr. Wilson: You’ve got a problem.
House: Tell me something I don’t know.
Dr. Wilson: You hire beautiful girls, enslave them, force them to be around you because you don’t know how to have an actual relationship. If they’re qualified, keep them. If not, fire them and ask them out.
House: You do realize that “tell me something I don’t know” is just an expression.
House: We can try and pretend we’re above it, we can try and intellectualize it away. But ultimately, shiny, pretty, perky things are good, and ugly, misshapen teenage boys are repulsive.
Darnell: The question was, do you resent Dr. Cuddy’s interference in your practice?
House: Oh. Well, then I guess my answer wasn’t very helpful, was it?
House: Take your steroids, you get to live, you can do your surgery. But it'll only change your face. It won't change who your face has made you.
House: I can't believe I'm that guy.
Dr. Wilson: Every guy is that that guy.
House: I'm not every guy.
Dr. Wilson: What is this, semantics here? All guys are that guy.
House: I'm not all guys! Cameron was smart.
Dr. Wilson: You know, I'm beginning to doubt that.
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