Total Isms in the database:
1958
1958
Housisms for episode Deception:
With Foreman as House's supervisor, the team must figure out if a woman who cried wolf too many times is really ill.
Dr. Foreman: I don't see a regrowth, did you have the medical records faxed over?
House: Smart, not hard, that's my philosophy boss.
Dr. Foreman: I'll take that as a no.
Dr. Foreman: Yeah, you're all about the nurture.
House: Do you need a hug?
Dr. Foreman: You injected her against her will, just so you could be right?
House: She consented.
Dr. Foreman: She's mentally ill.
House: But she smells all so sweet.
Dr. Foreman: You ordered MRIs for the whole maternity wing?
House: I was in a crazy mood, good thing I got a new boss to back me up, although I think one of them was actually necessary.
Dr. Cameron: There's even books in the bathroom.
House: Either she's very smart or she has a fiber deficiency.
Dr. Cameron: Scan showed a mass in her pancreas.
Dr. Chase: Looks malignant, probably inoperable... I'd give her two months.
House: On the bright side, still means I was right.
Dr. Chase: Why don't you just get the sample yourself? Since when do you care what your boss said?
House: I don't care what anybody says, I care what they do. Right now, Blackpoleon Blackaparte has got the nurses on red alert, I can't get into the patient's room. So come on, I'll draw the enemy fire, you outflank them, get in there, get the bone marrow sample.
House: Sorry, I missed that. Hearing's been off since the Ricky Martin concert. Some cholo kicked me in the head.
House: What else turns you on? Drugs? Casual sex? Rough sex? Casual rough sex? I'm a doctor, I need to know.
Dr. Cameron: How would you describe my leadership skills?
House: Non-existent. Otherwise excellent.
Dr. Cameron: She's got an appointment with her ophthalmologist on Tuesday and an appointment with her gynecologist on Thursday. Multiple appointments with multiple doctors...symptom of Munchausen's.
House: Or, just thinking outside the box here, she has a vagina and trouble reading.
House: Nice move, boss. Way to cover your ass.
Dr. Foreman: I just agreed with you.
House: Not because you think I'm right. You're just taking the safe route. You're a wuss. Don't worry; your secret is safe with me. (leaves office) WIlson!! Guess what Foreman did!
Dr. Foreman: What do you expect me to do, House? Quit? Cry?
House: Actually, I expect you to act like what you are--my employee, my subordinate, my bitch.
House: Do you like Teeny Tiny Moe in the fifth?
Anica: I went four for six yesterday. You want winners, cure me first.
House: Are you trying to cop a feel?
Do-Gooder: I took a CPR class.
House: That would be useful if she were having a heart attack instead of a seizure.
Anica: You might as well burn your money.
House: I'll burn my winnings; bigger flame.
Dr. Chase: Gambling doesn't take away your pain.
House: It does when I win.
House: You probably shouldn't have sex for a while.
Hailey: For how long?
House: On an evolutionary basis, I'd recommend... forever.
House: At the end of "The Boy Who Cried Wolf," the wolf really does come. And he eats the sheep, and the boy, and the parents.
Dr. Chase: The wolf doesn't eat the parents.
House: It does when I tell it.
Technician: You're going to need more blood.
House: The patient's empty.
Technician: Then I can't do it.
House: You can try.
Technician: I can try to look like Salma Hayek -- that's not going to make it happen.
House: You may not have Selma's ass, but she doesn't have your eyes.
Technician: Yeah, right. (after looking at a smiling House) How soon you need it?
Dr. Chase: I also realize that no matter what you do, you're still going to treat me like crap.
House: 'Crap' is a relative term.
Notice something that's missing from this episode?
Add It
Is there an error that we overlooked?
Suggest a Correction