Housisms : House vs. God

Housisms for episode House vs. God:

House treats a 15 year old faith healer, while Wilson feels left out when he finds out House has a weekly poker game.

Dr. Chase: You say "won the lottery," he says "miracle."
House: Yeah, the hand of God reached into this kid's pants, made him have sex, so he could scratch a rash, stick his fingers into some woman's face, and give her a few extra months. Come on, it's just another liar and manipulator.
Dr. Wilson: Well nobody's as perfect as you are.

Dr. Wilson: Did you remember my DVD player?
House: If you wanted it, you shouldn't have left it behind when you moved out.
Dr. Wilson: Oh! I get it, it's a drag watching porn on VHS.
House: I'll call you as soon as I'm done with it.

House: Faith; that's another word for ignorance, isn't it? I've never understood how people can be so proud of believing in something with no proof at all, like that's an achievement.

House: I fear for the human race. A teenager claims to be the voice of God and people with advanced degrees are listening.

House: You know, I get it that people are just looking for a way to fill the holes; that they want the holes; they want to live in the holes; and they go nuts when someone else pours dirt in their holes. Climb out of your holes, people!

House: Half the doctors who specialize in oncology turn into burnt-out cases but you... you eat neediness.
Dr. Wilson: Lucky for you.

House: (to Wilson) You're a functional vampire. Sure, you're heroic and useful to society but only because it feeds you.

Boyd: God says you look for excuses to be alone.
House: See, that is exactly the kind of brilliance that sounds deep, but you could say it about any person who doesn't pine for the social approval of everyone he meets, which you were cleverly able to deduce about me by not being a moron. Next time tell God to be more specific.
Boyd: God wants you to invite Dr. Wilson to your poker game.

Boyd: Dad? You have to have faith in me...
Walter: I have faith in the Lord. You, I trust... as much as you can trust a teenage boy.

Dr. Wilson: And that's why religious belief annoys you. Because if the universe operates by abstract rules you can learn them, you can protect yourself. If a Supreme Being exists he can squash you any time he wants.
House: He knows where I am.

House: (doing introductions) Wilson! This is Dry Cleaner Guy. Tax Accountant. Guy from the bus stop. This is Wilson.
Dry Cleaner: How come he gets a name?
House: Seniority.

House: Don't talk to my patient.
Dr. Wilson: What are you talking about?
House: You get all huffy when my patient stumbles into yours in the hallway, but you've got no qualms about chatting my guy up.
Dr. Wilson: This is fun, it's like Password. Keep talking, I'll jump in when I get a clue what the hell you're talking about.

Dr. Wilson: House! Why the hell did you let an unstable patient wander the hallways?!?
House: His leash broke.

House: Isn't it interesting that religious behavior is so close to being crazy we can't tell it apart.

House: He is not a saint. He figures out what's going on in people's lives by watching, listening, deducing...
Dr. Wilson: And you're worried about trademark infringement?
House: Then he passes on advice from God so he can watch them jump. It's a power trip.
Dr. Wilson: Ah, and there the similarities end.

House: So, you're a faith healer? Or is that a perjorative? Do you prefer something like "divine health management"?

Dr. Chase: You're going to talk to a patient?
House: God talks to him. It'd be arrogant of me to assume I'm better than God.

House: God ever talk to you when you were in the seminary?
Dr. Chase: Ummm... no.
House: God's loss, our gain.

House: God talks to him!
Dr. Chase: It's not psychosis, he's just religious, the only medical issue that showed up on the blood work is low sodium.
House: No, you talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic.

House: Got to go; building full of sick people. If I can hurry, maybe I can avoid them.

Boyd: The nurses talk about you a lot.
House: Ah, don't believe them, I keep a sock in my pants.

Dr. Wilson: Can this wait five minutes?
House: Is she dying?
Dr. Wilson: Yes.
House: Before the end of this consult?
Dr. Wilson: They could build monuments to your self-centeredness.

House: You would let this kid die just to get into a stupid poker game?
Dr. Wilson: You'd let him die to keep me out?

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Home Housisms Forums Quote Of The Day Buy House on DVD Contribute Other Isms Links Total Isms in the database: 1958	Housisms for episode House vs. God: House treats a 15 year old faith healer, while Wilson feels left out when he finds out House has a weekly poker game. Dr. Chase: You say "won the lottery," he says "miracle." House: Yeah, the hand of God reached into this kid's pants, made him have sex, so he could scratch a rash, stick his fingers into some woman's face, and give her a few extra months. Come on, it's just another liar and manipulator. Dr. Wilson: Well nobody's as perfect as you are. Dr. Wilson: Did you remember my DVD player? House: If you wanted it, you shouldn't have left it behind when you moved out. Dr. Wilson: Oh! I get it, it's a drag watching porn on VHS. House: I'll call you as soon as I'm done with it. House: Faith; that's another word for ignorance, isn't it? I've never understood how people can be so proud of believing in something with no proof at all, like that's an achievement. House: I fear for the human race. A teenager claims to be the voice of God and people with advanced degrees are listening. House: You know, I get it that people are just looking for a way to fill the holes; that they want the holes; they want to live in the holes; and they go nuts when someone else pours dirt in their holes. Climb out of your holes, people! House: Half the doctors who specialize in oncology turn into burnt-out cases but you... you eat neediness. Dr. Wilson: Lucky for you. House: (to Wilson) You're a functional vampire. Sure, you're heroic and useful to society but only because it feeds you. Boyd: God says you look for excuses to be alone. House: See, that is exactly the kind of brilliance that sounds deep, but you could say it about any person who doesn't pine for the social approval of everyone he meets, which you were cleverly able to deduce about me by not being a moron. Next time tell God to be more specific. Boyd: God wants you to invite Dr. Wilson to your poker game. Boyd: Dad? You have to have faith in me... Walter: I have faith in the Lord. You, I trust... as much as you can trust a teenage boy. Dr. Wilson: And that's why religious belief annoys you. Because if the universe operates by abstract rules you can learn them, you can protect yourself. If a Supreme Being exists he can squash you any time he wants. House: He knows where I am. House: (doing introductions) Wilson! This is Dry Cleaner Guy. Tax Accountant. Guy from the bus stop. This is Wilson. Dry Cleaner: How come he gets a name? House: Seniority. House: Don't talk to my patient. Dr. Wilson: What are you talking about? House: You get all huffy when my patient stumbles into yours in the hallway, but you've got no qualms about chatting my guy up. Dr. Wilson: This is fun, it's like Password. Keep talking, I'll jump in when I get a clue what the hell you're talking about. Dr. Wilson: House! Why the hell did you let an unstable patient wander the hallways?!? House: His leash broke. House: Isn't it interesting that religious behavior is so close to being crazy we can't tell it apart. House: He is not a saint. He figures out what's going on in people's lives by watching, listening, deducing... Dr. Wilson: And you're worried about trademark infringement? House: Then he passes on advice from God so he can watch them jump. It's a power trip. Dr. Wilson: Ah, and there the similarities end. House: So, you're a faith healer? Or is that a perjorative? Do you prefer something like "divine health management"? Dr. Chase: You're going to talk to a patient? House: God talks to him. It'd be arrogant of me to assume I'm better than God. House: God ever talk to you when you were in the seminary? Dr. Chase: Ummm... no. House: God's loss, our gain. House: God talks to him! Dr. Chase: It's not psychosis, he's just religious, the only medical issue that showed up on the blood work is low sodium. House: No, you talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic. House: Got to go; building full of sick people. If I can hurry, maybe I can avoid them. Boyd: The nurses talk about you a lot. House: Ah, don't believe them, I keep a sock in my pants. Dr. Wilson: Can this wait five minutes? House: Is she dying? Dr. Wilson: Yes. House: Before the end of this consult? Dr. Wilson: They could build monuments to your self-centeredness. House: You would let this kid die just to get into a stupid poker game? Dr. Wilson: You'd let him die to keep me out? Notice something that's missing from this episode? Add It Is there an error that we overlooked? Suggest a Correction
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