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1439
1439
Housisms for episode Euphoria - Part 2:
Foreman continues to experience the same progression of symptoms as the police officer. When he realizes he may be facing imminent death, he calls his father who comes to his son's side. As it comes down to a race against time, House believes the solution to the illness is in the police officer's apartment.
House: He (Guard from the CDC) hasn't gotten up to pee in hours. He's due.
Dr. Wilson: You haven't sprinkled granules on his donut? His bowels would open up like the red sea.
House: He wouldn't eat the donut.
Wilson: Have you seriously been down here for hours?
House: No. I had to pee a couple times.
Dr. Wilson: You've gotta stop blaming Cuddy for this.
House: Given that it is her fault, it's appropriate.
Dr. Wilson: That part is her fault. The part where somebody wasted his time in a basement plotting the overthrow of a government agency, that one's on you.
House: Forget it. You just biopsied a mattress.
Dr. Cuddy: One afternoon, and you're on pace to set the record for most patients seen in a month!
House: You're upset that I'm doing clinic hours? Wow, that is so like rain on your wedding day.
Cuddy: (House comes in with Foreman's father) What is this?
House: He's not a what, he's a who. They even have the right to vote now.
Dr. Foreman: I'd rather be disabled than dead.
House: Sure, I make it look oh so sexy. It's actually not as glamorous as you might think.
House: First symptom is euphoria.
Dr. Wilson: How do you know if a rat's euphoric?
House: He doesn't usually climb on his water bottle like that, does he?
House: Cameron, what type of illnesses affect humans but not rats?
Dr. Cameron: Why are you asking me that?
House: Because I'm sure that you spent the first twelve years of your life dreaming of being a vet.
House: In actuality, all your little girl is doing...is saying "Yoo hoo to the who-who."
Claire: She's what?
House: "Marching the penguin." (Claire looks blank) "Ya-yaing the Sisterhood." "Finding Nemo." (Grace giggles) Liked that one.
Claire: Are you saying that my daughter (covers her daughter's ears) is masturbating?
House: I was trying to be discreet. There's a child in the room!
House: As soon as (Steve the Rat) gets sick, I do an autopsy.
Dr. Wilson: As soon as he's dead.
House: Right after he gets sick, there's a good chance he'll get hit in the head with a... cane-shaped object.
Dr. Cameron: If it was toxic mold, I'd be sick.
House: How do we know you're not sick?
Dr. Cameron: Do I seem happy to you?
House: Never.
Dr. Cuddy: A thin slice of Joe's brain could also cause a public health crisis.
House: It's not a good idea to scream "Fire" every time someone lights a match.
Dr. Foreman: I'm okay?
House: Your breath stinks and you're peeing into a bag. What are our names?
Dr. Foreman: You did the biopsy? Thank you.
House: Names.
Dr. Foreman: Cameron, my dad, and the manipulative bastard.
House: You remembered.
House: I screwed up.
Dr. Cameron: How can you not capture a blind bird?
House: That's not what I meant. I screwed up the first time through this place.
Dr. Wilson: Why weren't you with Foreman?
House: I hang out in the basement, you rag on me. I stay in my office, you rag on me. Honky just can't buy a break.
House: That was great!
Dr. Cameron: It was rude and unnecessary.
House: Yeah!
House: Pain makes us make bad decisions, fear of pain is almost as big a motivator.
Rodney: My son says you're a manipulative bastard.
House: It's a pet name. I call him "Dr. Bling."
Dr. Cameron: Foreman's black.
House: What? How long have you been sitting on this information?
House: Philosophical question; how do you want to die?
Dr. Foreman: Old age.
Rose: You're a goof.
House: Takes one to know one, loser. Wait, that means I'm a loser. Scratch that.
Dr. Wilson: You're accessing a webcam?
House: Cuddy's shower. Are you a fan of the Brazilian?
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