Housisms : Damned If You Do

Housisms for episode Damned If You Do:

A nun whose hands are red, swollen and cracked is sent to House. The nun believes it is stigmata, but House suspects an allergic reaction. He gives her some pills, which cause her to become unable to breathe. As her condition worsens, her fellow sisters pray for her while House and his team work to discover the cause of her illness while House has to wonder if he mis-administered the illness.

House: (to Sister Augustine) You must be all the talk around the holy water cooler.

Sister Eucharist: (The hypochondriac nun) tends to believe in things that aren't real.
House: Really? I thought that was a job requirement for you people.

Dr. Wilson: You want to come over for Christmas dinner?
House: You're Jewish.
Dr. Wilson: Yeah, Hanukkah dinner. What do you care -- it's food, it's people.

Dr. Wilson: Sixth circle of Hell?
House: Confined in a sweat box with a bloody nose and all the tissues are soggy.
Dr. Wilson: I think that's the Seventh?
House: Nope. The Seventh...
Dr. Wilson: God, you must be fun at parties.
House: I think we both know the flaw in that theory.

House: You know how it is with nuns - take out their IUDs and they bounce right back.

House: I had to open her blouse to do CPR, I learned two things. Nuns can have nice breasts, and she has a tattoo on her shoulder. Of a skunk. Now, maybe it's the sacred skunk of Joseph...

House: I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone, that someone is probably the last person you should ask.
Mother Superior: Ah. And have you been speaking to Sister Eucharist?
House: She ratted out her fellow sister pretty quickly. If I were you, I'd have her repeat a year of nun school. (edit)
House: And the old nun thinks the sick nun is a big fat nun liar.

House: What do you know about the nun?
Dr. Chase: Which one?
House: The cute one. I think she likes me. The sick one, obviously.

House: I am both amused and annoyed that you think I should be less stubborn than you are.

House: ("admitting" to giving the nun the wrong dosage of epinephrine) So there I was, in the clinic, drunk, so I opened the drawer, closed my eyes, grabbed the first syringe I could find...

House: I also recognize that I am human and capable of error.
Dr. Wilson: So you might have screwed this up?
House: No.
Dr. Wilson: So it's merely a theoretical capacity for error?
House: Good point. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe that's my error.

Dr. Chase: I hate nuns.
House: Who doesn't?

Dr. Foreman: Everyone screws up. Your rule. I think you fit within the subset of 'everyone'.
House: I didn't screw up.

House: What the hell are those?
Dr. Cameron: Candy canes.
House: Candy canes? Are you mocking me.
Dr. Cameron: No. It's, it's Christmas, and I thought...
House: Relax -- it's a joke.

Sister Eucharist: The sisters tend to interpret their illnesses as divine intervention.
House: And you don't? You're wearing an awfully funny hat.

Sister Eucharist: Thank you for your patience.
Dr. Wilson: Is she talking to you?
House: I don't know. She's certainly looking at me...

House: I've been a doctor for years -- why do I have to keep assuring people I know what I'm doing?

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Home Housisms Forums Quote Of The Day Buy House on DVD Contribute Other Isms Links Total Isms in the database: 1439	Housisms for episode Damned If You Do: A nun whose hands are red, swollen and cracked is sent to House. The nun believes it is stigmata, but House suspects an allergic reaction. He gives her some pills, which cause her to become unable to breathe. As her condition worsens, her fellow sisters pray for her while House and his team work to discover the cause of her illness while House has to wonder if he mis-administered the illness. House: (to Sister Augustine) You must be all the talk around the holy water cooler. Sister Eucharist: (The hypochondriac nun) tends to believe in things that aren't real. House: Really? I thought that was a job requirement for you people. Dr. Wilson: You want to come over for Christmas dinner? House: You're Jewish. Dr. Wilson: Yeah, Hanukkah dinner. What do you care -- it's food, it's people. Dr. Wilson: Sixth circle of Hell? House: Confined in a sweat box with a bloody nose and all the tissues are soggy. Dr. Wilson: I think that's the Seventh? House: Nope. The Seventh... Dr. Wilson: God, you must be fun at parties. House: I think we both know the flaw in that theory. House: You know how it is with nuns - take out their IUDs and they bounce right back. House: I had to open her blouse to do CPR, I learned two things. Nuns can have nice breasts, and she has a tattoo on her shoulder. Of a skunk. Now, maybe it's the sacred skunk of Joseph... House: I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone, that someone is probably the last person you should ask. Mother Superior: Ah. And have you been speaking to Sister Eucharist? House: She ratted out her fellow sister pretty quickly. If I were you, I'd have her repeat a year of nun school. (edit) House: And the old nun thinks the sick nun is a big fat nun liar. House: What do you know about the nun? Dr. Chase: Which one? House: The cute one. I think she likes me. The sick one, obviously. House: I am both amused and annoyed that you think I should be less stubborn than you are. House: ("admitting" to giving the nun the wrong dosage of epinephrine) So there I was, in the clinic, drunk, so I opened the drawer, closed my eyes, grabbed the first syringe I could find... House: I also recognize that I am human and capable of error. Dr. Wilson: So you might have screwed this up? House: No. Dr. Wilson: So it's merely a theoretical capacity for error? House: Good point. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe that's my error. Dr. Chase: I hate nuns. House: Who doesn't? Dr. Foreman: Everyone screws up. Your rule. I think you fit within the subset of 'everyone'. House: I didn't screw up. House: What the hell are those? Dr. Cameron: Candy canes. House: Candy canes? Are you mocking me. Dr. Cameron: No. It's, it's Christmas, and I thought... House: Relax -- it's a joke. Sister Eucharist: The sisters tend to interpret their illnesses as divine intervention. House: And you don't? You're wearing an awfully funny hat. Sister Eucharist: Thank you for your patience. Dr. Wilson: Is she talking to you? House: I don't know. She's certainly looking at me... House: I've been a doctor for years -- why do I have to keep assuring people I know what I'm doing? Notice something that's missing from this episode? Add It Is there an error that we overlooked? Suggest a Correction
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